Proof God Hates America: The 2016 GOP Candidates

Is there any greater proof of the Divine’s displeasure with America than the GOP Presidential lineup?

You’ve got this physically very large governor that seems to model his public persona on Tony Soprano. No, not Chris Christie, Jeb Bush. The Token Chick is known for bankrupting her company as CEO. The token gay, Miss Lindsay Graham, is known for being blackmailed by the Mossad – god knows what they have videos of him doing.

You’ve got Bobby Jindal, some sort of brown Hindu who is clearly in the wrong party, er, I mean country. Can we all chip in and put the man on a flight back to Goa?

The Token Christian, Rick Santorum. I mean, what is there to say? The man’s claim to fame is being against gay marriage. It was like his signature issue, well, that and wars for Israel. I mean the guy is Catholic, why does he give a shit about the apartheid regime of Jew bigotry in Zionist-occupied Palestine?

Then, there is Rick Perry. People thought he was stupid for his gaffes in the previous election, so this time he’s wearing thick rimmed hipster glasses in a ploy to look “smart.” You know, like some teenage girl, or Homer Simpson.

I mean you can’t make this shit up. Dear God please send a hurricane or tornado or something and punish this land with a punishment it so richly deserves. Amen.

Rick Perry Homer Simpson

4 thoughts on “Proof God Hates America: The 2016 GOP Candidates

  1. “You’ve got Bobby Jindal, some sort of brown Hindu who is clearly in the wrong party, er, I mean country. Can we all chip in and put the man on a flight back to Goa?”

    He’s in the right country, you’re just in the wrong century.

    Like

    1. “He’s in the right country, you’re just in the wrong century.”

      Just wondering: How many dicks were actively thrusting into your body as you typed this?

      Like

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